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Hamlet, again (more clown dramaturgy)

7/17/2026

0 Comments

 
PictureDead Yorick Photo: Vlada Nebo
General note
​This is the latest in a series of posts on Clown Dramaturgy. If you click on 'Clown Dramaturgy' in the Categories to the right – you can see, via a number of posts, a progression of the methods I use and develop each year (well, you'll see them going backwards in time, as the link will show you the most recent post first). This production happens as part of the module I teach on the amazing RADA Theatre Lab MA. (During the module I teach both Clown and Commedia and then devise and direct a classic text as approached through Clown).
 
Content Advice: It's Hamlet, so expect reference to death and other tragic things.


As for previous years, the Clown Council Process was used - it's a playful and valuable way to generate ideas for concept, casting and metaphors for approaching adapting a Shakespearean text from a clown perspective. 

Clown Council Process - extracts from the 'minutes' of the meeting
Clowns sit on chairs in a circle. The clowns are instructed to stand when they feel the impulse to speak. There is one chairperson/scribe to open and close the meeting (and furiously scribble notes in between to capture what happens). 
​
The first clown stood and said, 'I think it was a play.' 
​Another said, 'I feel sorry for Horatio, he was the only one alive.’
At one point a number of clowns spontaneously stood and mimed digging - a chorus of gravediggers.
‘Hamlet is a spoiled brat.’
Someone said. “The play is a bad advert for Denmark,’
Said another. ‘’Poison – what a waste of wine.’
'Hamlet is a spoiled brat'
‘If there’s a play within a play, where are we now?’
‘Does Horatio fancy Hamlet?’ ‘
'The Mousetrap was stolen from Agatha Christie!’
‘Ophelia has hay fever and the flowers are crying.’
Someone said, ‘Poor Yorick’ and several began to chant: ‘One of us! One of us!’
‘If Hamlet is raised by a clown, why is he not funny?’
Who is Fortinbras?’ To which came the response: ‘I don’t want to fight in my bra.’
(Tragically, there is no photo of the beautifully constructed Fought-in-bras costume. The bras were also part of Fort-in-bras weaponry - bow and catapult)
‘In the play, men talk about suicide but women kill themselves.’
‘Does feeling sad make you bad at swimming?’
‘Is murder misunderstanding?’
‘I wonder how the pirates felt?’

 Some clever quips, a touch of existentialism - and many good clown-playable ideas. 
​

Early choices

The Council is formally closed and the group come out of clown state. Someone mentioned - 'What a great way to think about the play.' (One of the main points of focus of a clown teacher is getting people out of their thinking brains and into body and imagination.)
With this experience informing the tone of the discussion, we look at the main areas of interest. I mentioned that we could welcome text from other sources into our production. Someone immediately said ‘Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.’ We talked about the play within the play and opted for puppetry. You will see the genius puppet theatre contribution in images to come, below.

This year's group reported that they had created a number of pieces on the course already with dark and personal/political material and they were pleased to approach our source text with an accent on the clown, without further inflecting the source text by interrogating an issue or exploring/exploiting a genre.

There would still be content of substance, of course - Hamlet taps into identity, meaning and mortality.

​I was delighted by the spontaneous chorus of Gravediggers. 
It's cathartic to let clowns play with the subject of mortality. Our very first stage image was the ensemble onstage, miming digging. You can see them in the background of the image below.

To place a meta approach very early on, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern appear and walk forward, through the diggers. They wear dark classes and have a superior attitude / absurd theatre vibe. In Stoppard’s play, these characters are first seen in isolation. In our piece, they still seem existentially lost, but with a hunger to take up space - and they come in multiple pairs. In this photo below, we see the three sets of R&G's paying tribute to the playwright who put these peripheral characters front and centre - the recently passed Tom Stoppard. 

This scene sets up: multiple casting, clown failure (some of them don't know what play they are doing),  and the themes of uncertainty and death. Also, the theme of theatre performance: In the original play, we are shown Hamlet's decision to act mad, his plan to spot his father's killer by staging a playlet and his constant reflection on how he should act and whether he should take action.

Picture
Picture
Uncertainty, death and theatre performance

Ros 1:  How very intriguing! I feel like a spectator.
I’m hoping that somebody interesting will come on in a minute …
Guil looks around
Guil 1:  No. I can’t see anyone .. What a predicament  – to be kept intrigued without ever quite being enlightened …


A second, and then a third R&G pair arrive … they utter the same dialogue.

Stage management clown enters from SL and asks : Who are you?
ALL R&Gs: Guildenstern & Rosencrantz … Rosencrantz & Guildenstern


(We borrow and amplify Stoppard’s joke of the royals mixing up their names by having our clowns themselves confused by their own identity.)

Stage Management Clown: What are you doing?
Ros 1: The play is all about us.
Guil 2: The play is the thing.
Stage Management Clown:  What play?
All R&G: ‘Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead.’
The Gravediggers rush forward to measure the R&G’s.
Stage Management Clown: No no no no, guys guys guys. They’re not dead … yet.
All R&G's react.
Guil 2:
"Out, out, brief candle ..."

'The play is a bad advert for Denmark’

A small chorus of clowns enter. We have fun exploiting the fact that one of the greatest pieces of English literature is set not in England, but in Europe.

Various Chorus Clowns: 
Our play is set in Denmark – Home of Lego, Equality
And hygge, yes, same word as in Sweden.

A play in which a sassy, spoiled, overthinking, privileged Princeling talks about suicide,
- but it’s the women who actually kill themselves.


One of our performers is Finnish and, with their consent, we included the grudging perspective of a near national neighbour - a tiny foreshadowing of the war with another near neighbour, Norway.

'Hamlet is set in Denmark, but I am Finnish.
At a restaurant in Helsingør, - that’s Elsinore in Shakespeare, I mean English.
At a restaurant in Elsinore, the waiter asks: Are you finished? And the stupid Danish guy says:
No, I am Danish.
Get it? Finished - Finnish?'
A deadpan beat
I have more jokes about Denmark. beat I’ve started so now I’ll Finnish... get it? Finnish.

The audience found the deadpan delivery of this very appealing. And the stupid Finnish-finished joke got some great repeats and a hilarious capping callback in the climactic duel scene.

 
 










​


​‘'''' ' 'If Hamlet is raised by a clown, why is he not funny?’
​

A great thing about adapting a classic in clown is the possibility to centre alternate perspectives, to reveal the hidden and feature the neglected. 

Childish laughter from upstage breaks up the clown chorus scene and we see a back-story flashback of Hamlet's boyhood - the makings of a 'sassy, spoiled, overthinking, privileged Princeling,'

Picture
Picture
‘He hath borne me on his back a thousand times … those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft’. We explore the Dark Clown concept of Enforced Performance: 'Carry me on your back again! Kiss me on the lips! Tell me a joke! Dance for me!'
'Hamlet is a spoiled brat'

Brat-Hamlet demands Yorick carry him, kiss him, dance and sing. Instead of a Shakespearean song, the someone said: 'The wheels on the bus!'. Perfect to create bathos. Our beleaguered Yorick collapses and dies while being compelled to sing it.
(Enter gravediggers and their measuring tapes) 'I love that song Yorick!  Exits merrily and obliviously singing: ‘Yorick the clown falls down, falls down.’ 
It is satisfying to have the audience witness Yorick"s oppression. Later we will see Hamlet sentimentalise his childhood playtime with Yorick (in the Pirate boat scene).

Although this set-up of Yorick's suffering was a strong idea, the full through-line of Yorick's character took a while to reveal itself. The performer playing Yorick was wonderfully patient while also diligent in finding gestural moments for presence, counterpoint, accent and attitude in the ensemble scenes.  I knew Yorick would have a starring moment later, in the graveyard where the gravediggers become a Busby Berkley chorus and Yorick channels some edgy energy (inspired by the atmosphere in David Lynch's film Blue Velvet - specifically the scene where a man lip-synchs to Candy Coloured Clown). Writing up notes one night, I realised a prop would be useful and ordered a skull sceptre. Medieval and Renaissance jesters often carried a Marotte, or Fool's Bauble. It's a broken-mirror version of the king's sceptre - a stick topped with a carving of their own head. A Marotte lies on the floor in this haunting painting depicting an exhausted clown regrouping before returning to perform. (We featured the high-stakes plight of the 'indentured comedy-maker' in the previous year's production of King Lear).  The Marotte prop brought clearer opportunities for shape-making, rhythmic accents and punctuation and helped give the character even more edge, quirkiness and status.

'The funeral baked meats did coldly furnish forth the marriage table.'

A classic clown prop - the rubber chicken - helped present the lust of the royals as ridiculous (Claudius plays the chicken-feet over Gertrude's breast, then she stupidly  and sensually wipes the beak across his  face), and for power and indulgence to be elided  (as well as representing 'baked meats', the chicken was held by the Claudius players as a sceptre). In this image, we see Hamlet working his moody adolescent-goth 'madness'. Horatio is wearing denim, to give a cowboy vibe. This serves the clown council observation about Horatio 'fancying Hamlet' (in keeping with the clown dramaturgy opportunity to shine a light on alternate perspectives on the original). In this adaptation, we accord Horatio a touch of extra extra agency, and make his plight more poignant, by using some memorable Brokeback Mountain text in the upcoming graveyard scene. It's a slow-burn payoff.
Picture
We had a joyous carnival of acro and dance when The Players arrived on scene. Polonius, who had excitedly announced their arrival, is literally swept up treated with a lack of dignity. Look at that tragic face - clowns know all about being out-of-step with events.
Picture


​Next, Hamlet's advice to the actors gave us an opportunity to enjoy adding a Clown Drama Coach. Someone gathered some quotes from revered theatre practitioners and we selected a pertinent few.
Clown Player: “To act is to do, not to think.”
Drama Coach Clown: Uta Hagen
Another Clown Player:  "The text is your greatest enemy."
Drama Coach Clown: Meisner
Clown Player 3: I can see you are talking about the text.
Clown Player 4: I can see you were talking about the text.
Clown Player 4: I can see you are talking about the enemy.
Another Clown Player: I can see you can see I was talking about the enemy.


'The Mousetrap was stolen from Agatha Christie!’
​

After all that talk of acting - surprise! -the performance is a puppet play.  Two students made the puppets for the play. You can see in the image below, the puppets worked both inside and outside the box.
This is a rapidly posed pic and one of the Hamlet players is supporting the puppet theatre. The big 'H' identifies the Hamlet player of the moment - in this beat of the story, he would have worn a layer over the tee-shirt, as Goth-Hamlet (seen right) is driving this scene.  When the poisoned Old King puppet, as part of his death throes, vomits over the front of the tiny theatre 'stage', the 'supporting' player reacts as if it is splattering down on him. 

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This cardboard-box theatre manages to deliver a delightful change of scale, a point of focus, and, with its vivid red curtain, some added theatrical panache.
Picture
Check Claudius holding the tiny poison bottle.
Picture
The original and the adaptation

This blog post does not describe all the events as they happened in the sharing / showing and skips about with the order, also. The entire piece is devised and rehearsed in about 12 hours of class time. To the right here is a list of 'ingredients'/ scenes.

I believe clown adaptation reserves the right to play fast and loose with the representation of key events and also the time-line of the original. Events can be re-ordered for various reasons - one of which can simply be to bring an entertaining change of tone from scene to scene.
​
The game plan of the clown troupe needed to be threaded through and realised - namely, 
their desire to change Ophelia's fate.

With a cast of 18 in a student production, it's necessary to share out the main character parts (e.g. Hamlet above).

Role changes are directly commented on; peppered through like a gentle running gag. 'Who gets to act what' is a nice echo of the plot issue of 'who gets to be King' and also an extended expression of the deeper existential theme of 'how to act'.

Picture​To the up-tempo Nino Rota track 'I Clowns', we have a sequence of ridiculous fighting. In pairs or threesomes, the ensemble generated some inept fighting moves to create a stageful of comical motifs.
Following through the threads
​

Working the C of Contrast, we show the discrepancy between modern day Denmark and Hamlet's sentiment "Denmark's a Prison".

Clown Chorus: Denmark is consistently ranked as one of the top three happiest countries in the world.
Head Gravedigger: And yet - something is rotten in the state of Denmark.
Horatio : "Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so."
Clown Chorus:  There is a tense state of conflict that is on the brink of  … WAAAAAR!




Picture
More prop magic - a Lego Castle

Jon Davison writes with comprehensively researched detail on the importance of props to clowns. It's also dealt with in this book: 'The Semiotics of Clowns and Clowning: Rituals of Transgression and the Theory of Laughter' by Paul Bouissac. I've mentioned my thoughts on the subject in these blog posts. 

As with Chekhov's gun, you can't mention Lego and not show it. 

 The war scene covers the deconstruction of the puppet play scene. In turn, the fighting figures melt and part to clear centre for Claudius and Gertrude entering with the devoted Polonius holding the Lego castle.

Kudos to the ensemble member who bought and made the Lego Castle - it brought genius stupidity and clown magic - the Lego model was such a gloriously reductive emblem of the themes of position, heritage and power which is the background situation of the play. It also ties together the therapeutic (how to cultivate human happiness) aspects of our production.  

Claudius (rattled by having seen the puppet play): I need to calm my nerves with some Lego.
Gertrude enters in a submissive way and becomes the table. Polonius places Lego on G's back & goes.
Claudius: Ah. It’s my castle, my "little patch of ground". And I’ll be safe here for ever and ever.  (mimes a heart with his hands) I heart Elsinore. 


It pleases me that the tangible object of the Lego Castle means we can feature this beautifully simple
phrase from Act 4, Scene 4. The "little patch of ground" refers to a worthless piece of territory in Poland that Prince Fortinbras’s army is marching to conquer. The Captain says it was only worth "five ducats ... I would not farm it'. And yet, it generates military action and domestic bloodshed. A ludicrous prop to match the absurd amount of ado caused by the folly of intangible honour.

At the end of this scene, Hamlet chooses not to kill Claudius, because he does not want Claudius to die happy. 

More following through

R & G enter from R and L side.
Ros: Who’s that now?
Guil: It’s Claudius.
 
[The role was one of those shared between different performers] 
Ros: He’s changed.
Guil: Theatre.  Can do that to a person.
[the full stop is Comedy Craft - aiding clarity in delivery]
R&G double take at Hamlet. Ros + Guil: Who are you? ***

[Hamlet, being a shared role, is now played by a third performer.]

This little exchange continues the theme / motif of theatre and acting and also that of identity-in-question. The implications of the "Who's there?" at the very start of Hamlet has been discussed by many scholars.

Ham and Mam

This is how I mentally label Act 3 Scene 4, where we see the possibly Oedipal and dysfunctional relationship between Hamlet and his mother. In our adaption we see it played out with different dynamics by three simultaneous pairs. If it were a funded production, there would be moody lighting - here we change the mood as much as we can by introducing an intriguing and uneasy tune - Nino Rota's Casanova. 
The goose-pimple feel of the track is also good to support the appearance of the Dead King's Ghost, which appears to Hamlet in this scene. Hamlet is upset and stabs the eavesdropping Polonius through the drapes. 
We have not yet mentioned the Therapist Clown who addresses the audience from stage edge to frame this scene.

Therapist Clown: 'A boy’s earliest choice of objects for his desires are incestuous and forbidden ones'. (Freud)

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"Mother, you have my father much offended." Note: In all our clown productions, all roles are open to be played by any gender.
Picture
Our Therapist Clown - glasses in hand, notebook and (look closely to see it) a Kleenex box under her arm.
Pathos and Punctured Pomposity

We put death front and centre with our opening scene. Now that we are in the iconic graveyard scene, we get to show different flavours of dealing with death.

We have a pragmatic, literally 'down to earth' Gravedigger,
an embittered, satirical Yorick
and
(again, showing things not shown in the original) our oblivious and voluble Polonius who, despite being deceased, reads his own epitaph. A good clown ploy to logically follow things to an illogical conclusion.

Putting things on their heads, we give one of the original play's big soliloquies to the Gravedigger.


Head Gravedigger :
It’s a terrible job, being a grave digger.
Quite depressing.
Walks to Polonius' body and plants his (mimed) shovel in the ground.
Look at the body - as if wishing it would decompose immediately.
O, that this too too solid flesh would melt
Thaw and resolve itself into a dew!
few steps forward to audience
And that the Everlasting had not fix'd
His canon 'gainst self-slaughter!
Do hanging gesture with sfx - repeat
Looks at graveyard
How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable,
Seem to me all the uses of this world!
Look to the audience
'tis an unweeded garden,
That grows to seed; (now think of the Epstein files)   
things rank and gross in nature
Possess it merely.

Head Gravedigger looks at note from his pocket 
So, who have we got today, then?

Old man, a father …
Gravedigger pulls up shovel, swings it into position and starts to dig the grave.
Polonius (his body in position on centre, from the previous scene) stands up, surprised, with an inner thought “O, did I fall over?” 
Dead Polonius:  (reading aloud an AI-generated obituary) Polonius, the esteemed and loquacious Lord Chamberlain of Denmark died unexpectedly at Elsinore Castle. A loyal advisor to King Claudius and a devoted and flawed (express surprise) flawed? no, they must mean flawless. FLAWLESS father to Laertes and Ophelia. He was known for his dedication to the State and his penchant for surveillance.
Head Gravedigger still digging in background, body in back view.
Pol interrupts himself, quietly surprised : I thought listening through the curtains was a good idea ….

Polonius sits on the floor, and lies down in steps, his speech timed with each move: 
His tragic / and unexpected death / leaves a void / in the Danish court.

Head Gravedigger shovels dirt onto the prone Polonius - with each shovel-load, a member of the ensemble rises and flops like earth on Polonius until he is buried in bodies.


It is a moment of visual poetry.

 (Here we borrow text from Cymbeline, the Bible and Richard III.)

Yorick (intoning): ‘Fear no more the heat of the sun'.
Thou art dust
Ensemble rolls off Polonius' body and away like dust
and unto dust shalt thou return sprinkle action with Marotte.
"The worst is Death, and death will have his day." 
Beat. Change of tone.

At least a sassy, spoiled, overthinking, privileged Princeling
didn’t break your back!
Clicks heels merrily, then flinches and grabs his injured back as he exits.

​Another classic clown prop - the squirty flower

Laertes (wearing a mortar cap and gown) enters to the royal couple. He is righteous and also resentful that his uni studies have been interrupted.

Ophelia enters mournfully singing 'Why do you build me up, Buttercup, baby?' The flower headdress was a joy and the squirty flower brought great clown play.

Ophelia was doubled all the way through. In a scene previous to this, we saw the shorts-wearing Mad Ophelia* coaching Sad Ophelia with feminist theory, advice 'don't be sad, be mad!' This happened in a split stage moment with Hamlet simultaneously declaring to Horatio that he would act mad.
*(Mad as in angry).

Image 1: Laertes and the royals
Image 2: Laertes is obsessed with being at uni (see Mortar board) - he has freedom while obedient Ophelia does not - a little water puts the scales of justice to rights.
Image 3: King Claudius cops it. '"There's fennel for you, [squirt] and columbines." [squirt]
Image 4: 
"You shall wear your rue with a difference." [squirt on Gertrude's crotch] 
Image 5: Mad Ophelia amplifying Sad Ophelia's tears  
Image 6: Therapist Clown is always Kleenex-ready

[Revisiting the first Clown chorus bit: 

Clown chorus member A: A play in which a sassy, spoiled, overthinking, privileged Princeling talks about suicide,
Clown chorus member B: but it’s the women who actually kill themselves.
Beat
Stage Manager Clown: That’s in the original play. Our version hopes to offer an improvement.**
​
**the liberation of Sad Ophelia]


​Dead Funny
​

While water is mopped up, Yorick delivers jokes supported by dance and drum rolls. Here is a compressed version of Yorick's 'tight five':
Picture

How’s it going everyone? All right?
“Lord, what fools these mortals be!”  drum
I once did a theatrical performance about Puns. It was a Play on Words.  drum 
According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. beat. That joke makes me die laughing. drum

Nope, already dead!  Drum and comic dance move 
Well, the stage is dry, and hopefully so are Ophelia’s eyes. Drum and wink
I’m going to leave you now, but remember this: sometimes you have to hug the people you don't like so you know how big to dig the hole in your backyard. drum


Dead in a box: succinct exposition and 'the old switcheroo'.

A huge salute to Tom Stoppard for this sublime piece of deadpan dialogue. We edited it and mixed it with tight, minimal, comic choreography (head turns, well-schooled timing and timbre) - it's a non-public student production so we can be as irreverent with this contemporary text as we are with Shakespeare. 
There is a subliminal pathos in the fact that the R&G's have been pared down to one single pair (sorry for the pun).
​
1: Are we dead now?
2: What happened?
1; Well, we were escorting Hamlet to the UK
2: To England
1: Right, England
2: (remembering) There was a letter
1: That’s right, King Claudius gave us a letter.
2: (dreadful penny dropping) What do you think it said?
1: Well that, er, I guess, that our old school pal Hamlet should be …
Gestures and makes a sound of throat slit
2: Smart of Claudius, outsourcing the killing,
1: not upsetting the queen by having it happen in the house -
2: But Hamlet did the old switcheroo
1: with the letter, saying it was us both facing in / facing out   for the chop
1&2 slowly as they turn to face each other: while we were sleeping ...
Both look out audience same beat
1: We should have slept in shifts.
Beat
2: Funny to think of yourself as actually dead. One thinks of lying in a box with the lid on it. 
And, one thinks of that like being alive in a box. (full stop)
Which is frightening.
1: (straight out to the audience - get the idea!) But if you’re dead … 
2: (slowly turn to one another ) you’d never know you were in a box!
It would be like being asleep. In a box.
(accelerate each line here) Not that I’d like to sleep, stuffed in a box. Not without any air. You'd wake up dead for a start and then where would you be?
Dead.
1 & 2: (look at one another quickly - slowly say the line) In a box.

Picture
All photos by Vlada Nebo
‘Does feeling sad make you bad at swimming?’​

Time for the clowns to subvert Ophelia's fate.
Enter the two Ophelias. Clown chorus behind establish a pool with lane swimmers.

Sad Ophelia fusses: 
Will it be cold? It looks cold?
Mad Ophelia coaches: YOU CAN DO THIS !


Fed up with her dithering, Mad Ophelia pushes her in, notices her go under, saves her from drowning, then teaches her how to swim. The clown chorus provide a water ballet. Despite zero budget - one of the company brought in a bubble gun to bring magical production values! We used this uplifting track. 
At the climax, each swimmer makes a letter with their bodies, yelling and spelling: F - R - E -  E - D -  O - M, and then: O - P - H -E - L - I - A!
Picture
The time for our photo shoot was minimal and I mourn that in this image above, we miss the performer making the prow. This image was visual clown poetry. The sail (more visible) was beautiful, too. The Clown Stage Manager recaps plot succinctly to situate this moment (not everyone remembers the pirate boat in Hamlet - it's shown in Stoppard's play, but in the original it's only mentioned in a letter).

I love the stupidity of the pirates having hooks. And the mixture of comedy and pathos. It's the famous 'to be' speech and it's not in the place it normally occurs in the play ... I love the counterpoint of noble suffering being repeatedly interrupted by the gleeful Pirates in the most stupid and annoying way. I used this idea of someone telling a painful moment and being expected to continue while being interrupted / upstaged in a production of The Comedy of Errors (click to read the Clown Dramaturgy blog on that).

Pirates (with rowdy joy and clapping with their hooks): Do the bit where you thought about killing yourself again!!!
 
Hamlet:
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows
 
Pirates:  SLINGS AND ARROWS … AND HOOKS!
 
Hamlet:  The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
 
Pirates: FORTUNE! TREASURE!!
 
Hamlet (reclaim the space):  OR to take arms against a sea ...
 
Pirates: SEA!!!

Hamlet gets to: 'To die—to sleep ... ' and realises the Pirates have fallen asleep and snoring.

Hamlet suffers in a difficult predicament - he has been saved by these guys, but they have been asking him to entertain them with the tragedy of his story, forcing him to perform.
(See Enforced Performance in other posts).
​
The scene ends with Hamlet saying:

Denmark is a prison ... and I never thought I’d miss it so much.

Switcheroo upon switcheroo & 'who's there?' continued


We're back in the graveyard. Our constant Horatio player meets the current performer as Hamlet (much taller and now brunette).

Hamlet:  Horatio.
Horatio: Hamlet??  Good to see you man. You’ve changed
Ham: I’ve been to England, innit. It rains a lot.
Previous Hamlet player at back, looking up from digging: That’s my part. I  used to play Hamlet …
Chorus of Gravediggers all look at her - no one cares.
Horatio goes in and hugs Hamlet
Horatio: I missed you (pulls away and shrugs to hide showing too much) ... dude.


And here is our Brokeback Mountain text, giving the normally ever-loyal Horatio a chance to vent:

Horatio: Tell you what, we coulda had a good life together! But you didn't want it, Hamlet. So what we got now is this graveyard in Elsinore!  That’s all we got. You have no idea how bad it gets. You are too much for me, Hamlet, I wish I knew how to quit you.

Horatio has opened up to Hamlet, who, self-centred as usual, has his attention fixed elsewhere.

Hamlet: Alas poor Yorick. I knew him Horatio!
 

Horatio (include audience): Whatever!
 
Hamlet: Here hung those lips that I have so often kissed. Where be your jokes now?
 
Young Brat-Hamlet laughs from side of stage
 
Yorick: Yeahhh where be they?


(NOTE: If we were doing it again, I would have Yorick say - I had a whole 5 minute set in the previous scene - you missed it! )
 
Hamlet: A fellow of infinite Jest. When I was a little boy. He bore me on his back a thousand times.
 
Yorick: Actually 999 times, then you broke it.


Hamlet (sweet melodrama): Then you broke - into SONG -  the wheels  on the bus go round and round round and round round and round the wheels on the bus (cry) all day long. 

The bathos of the annoying child's song enhances the ridiculousness of Hamlet's self-pitying grief.
 
Head Gravedigger comes on
Head Gravedigger : Oi Mate! Government property.
Horatio: Dude, you need help!
 
Therapist Clown ENTERS 
Therapist Clown: Clear case of early childhood trauma manifesting now in necrophiliac tendencies I would recommend three days a week talking therapy and also significant pharmaceutical assistance. 


Tying things up

Stage Manager Clown:
We saved Ophelia ...
Returning victorious from her Chanel swim, the previously 'Sad' Ophelia accidentally spits a mouthful of water on the Stage Manager Clown. 'Mad' Ophelia raises 'Sad' Ophelia's arm like a champ.
Therapist wipes Stage Manager Clown's face with a Kleenex.
Stage Manager Clown:  ... but we are not sure we can save the rest.
DRUMS and EXTENDED KAZOO fanfare
Claudius: WEAPONS!
ALL CAST: INHALE GASP
Polonius (to Hamlet and Laertes): Beware!
SECOND sword schling ALL CAST: INHALE GASP
Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,
Bear’t that the opposed may be-ware of thee.

Yorrick to Pol: They can’t hear you, you’re dead!
Stage Manager Clown:  Right - here we go! This is the final scene.
Laertes 1: This is the big scene where Laertes fights, / then forgives Hamlet
Laertes 2 (overlapping from /): This is the big scene where Laertes fights, then forgives Hamlet
Laertes 1:  What are you doing here?
Laertes 2: This is my scene
Laertes 1:No, it’s my scene, I’ve been missing for most of the play.
Laertes 2: I’ve been missing for most of the play.
Laertes 1 & 2 together: I’ve been at Uni.
Lalertes 2: Do you see this, o God? I told Claudius -
'you will not o'errule me to a peace.'
Laertes 1: ... but that means we will both be slain ...
R&G together It’s not so bad.
Clown Therapist: In the Kübler-Ross model, there are five stages of grief: denial //  anger // bargaining // depression // and acceptance).

Each 'stage' acted out but characters and chorus clowns in their own ways.

​There is so much more to say and tell but this has already been a long post.

Stage Manager Clown:  The play. needs. to finish.
Finnish Clown/Claudius is dead, but lifts up his head: Did someone say Finnish?


Image 1: When a member of the ensemble says: 'Please can there be a fish in the pirate boat scene?'
Image 2: When Ophelia enters, having completed her Channel cross - she accidentally exhales on the Clown Stage Manager 
Image 3: Horatio thirsting for and championing Hamlet during the Players carnival scene
Image 4: A 'Kiss me Hardy (Horatio)' moment for the dying Hamlet - a too-late pay-off for Horatio.
Image 5: Early scene - Mad Ophelia schooling Sad Ophelia with key Feminist texts
Image 6: Yorick being badass and receiving the gravediggers' adulation

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    30 years of practical research has created a new genre: Dark Clown. The Comedy of Terrors - Dark Clown & Enforced Performance was delivered at Bath Spa University. The work is cited in Clown (readings in theatre practice) by Jon Davison.
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    Images above: Tiff Wear, Robert Piwko, Douglas Robertson, PL and Graham Fudger. Illustration by
    Charlotte Biszewski. Mask: Alexander McPherson.

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